After years of reading romance novels and endless rom-coms it was easy for me to believe the love I was destined to have would be some cosmic event.
Love at first sight with a mysterious man with an accent, or that childhood love that never ends. But love is just love. How it begins, how it ends has little to do with how real it will turn out to be. They will be a real, living person just like you, riddled with imperfections. They will be on a journey, just like you, growing and learning from their mistakes.
There are certain things that can show that you are on the right path.
The struggle is getting to that point because it requires us to get out of our comfort zones and really put ourselves out there. We must set our pride aside, overcome the ego, and submit to love. Let it take us where it may. The most difficult thing to do in a relationship is to tear our walls down. They are there for a reason, to protect us. The fact that someone would care enough for you to risk their whole heart, and that you would do the same, is a good sign you are with the right person.
You can acknowledge where you mess up and use it as an opportunity to grow. This person understands that neither of you are mind readers and it will take communicating wants and needs to get to your very best. Having someone take accountability for his or her actions can be a surprising yet pleasant change.
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They know where you lack and love you for it rather than in spite of it. This person would not belittle you or be condescending,. When the ego gets involved it makes us resort to our selfish ways. Someone who can listen to you, process what you are saying, and believe in what you are saying. You know how your best friend or your mom might be the first person you can vent to or run to for protection? This person becomes an ally. The more compatible you are with your partner, the more successful your relationship will likely be.
12 Uncomfortable Signs You’re Dating The Right Person
Here are seven areas of compatibility to examine when choosing a partner. They don't all have to line up perfectly, but the more aligned you two are, the better the relationship will be. Do you find yourself saying, "If only she'd think before she spoke" or "I wish he'd be less lazy"? Is he overly anxious? Does her alphabetized music collection make your skin crawl? What you see is what you get; so if you don't like your partner's temperament, don't try to fix it.
Find someone whose personality is more compatible with yours. Are you direct or indirect in communicating what's important to you?
12 Uncomfortable Signs You’re Dating The Right Person | Thought Catalog
Are you passive while she's assertive? Do you hold things in until you explode or speak your mind clearly and directly? If you can both communicate clearly and in a similar fashion, you'll have a much higher chance for a successful relationship. Do you like and get along with each other's friends and family? Do you agree about how much time to devote to both? And if you're both single parents thinking about tying the knot, are you clear about how you'll parent?
If friends and family issues become too stressful, they will have a very negative effect on your relationship. Are you a gluten-free vegan while he is a Big Mac addict? Do you surf the waves on the weekend, while she's home surfing the web? This may seem like a minor point, but think about how many meals you will share with each other. How do your partner's food choices and attention to fitness align with your lifestyle and values?
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If you're not a good match in this area, you will probably have big challenges in your relationship. Many people say that they are seeking a partner who is financially secure. In today's volatile financial market, financial security is not something you can count on. A few more appropriate questions are, "Are you responsible with finances?
Do you contribute to charities? It is helpful if you share similar financial goals and habits. I don't believe you have to be with someone who has the exact same level of education. In fact, there are many brilliant people who never graduated college Steve Jobs, Rachael Ray. However, couples who share similar backgrounds in education and that includes self-study , life, and professional experience are usually better suited for each other. They have more in common and can relate to each other in a deeper way.
They are on the same wavelength and truly "get" each other. There are many things that come under the category of intimacy, including romance and public display of affection. Some couples have different sexual needs, which can lead to anger and resentment.
An essential component of a lasting loving relationship includes having similar ideas about frequency and style of intimacy.